Generic Quotes

"'Wicked' gave us a story that 'The Wizard of Oz' did not. Two sides to every story."

"A clever conjurer is welcome anywhere, and those of us whose powers of entertainment are limited to the setting of booby-traps or the arranging of apple-pie beds must view with envy the much greater tribute of laughter and applause which is the lot of the prestidigitator with some natural gift for legerdemain."

"A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new."

"A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?"

"A writer wants something more than money for his work: he wants permanence."

"All I can say is, I don't encourage younger kids to read my books, and actually, the biggest age group on my Facebook page is 25- to 35-year-old women."

"Almost anyone can be an author; the business is to collect money and fame from this state of being."

"Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves."

"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."

"As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy."

"Bores can be divided into two classes; those who have their own particular subject, and those who do not need a subject."

"Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing."

"Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?"

"Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater."

"Don't worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition."

"Every villain needs her story told."

"Football games on Friday nights followed by field parties every weekend was how I spent my high school years."

"Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad."

"He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help."

"How many legs does a dog have if you call his tail a leg? Four. Saying that a tail is a leg doesn't make it a leg."

"I am a slow walker, but I never walk back."

"I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live by the light that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right, and stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong."

"I am sure of this: that no one can write a book which children will like unless he write it for himself first."

"I came up with the idea of a daredevil who's going to go upside down, in a metal car, at 90 mph, and it's never been done before. I get into this metal car, I'm strapped in. You pull back, and it's a roller coaster at Magic Mountain, with kids and nuns and everything else! I pass out while everybody else is having a wonderful time."

"I can see humor in almost anything."

"I deal out of a reality that isn't real. I'm sorry. I don't know what that means. I don't really know what I do."

"I do not think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday."

"I don't like that man. I must get to know him better."

"I don't like to see animals get hurt."

"I gave up writing children's books. I wanted to escape from them as I had once wanted to escape from 'Punch': as I have always wanted to escape. In vain."

"I grew up in a small town in Alabama, and there wasn't much in the way of entertainment, so like our older siblings before us, we drove our pickup trucks out into the hayfield and lit a bonfire."

"I had no ambition to go into show business when I was growing up. I started out as an advertising copywriter and evolved into it. Once you get into it, however, it's very difficult to get out. It gets into your blood. You don't want to do anything else. You want that excitement."

"I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice."

"I like to build bridges... not walls."

"I like to see a man proud of the place in which he lives. I like to see a man live so that his place will be proud of him."

"I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity."

"I love Marty Funkhouser - but what is he?"

"I loved humor. I had that in me."

"I often say that poverty needs no passport to travel."

"I suppose that every one of us hopes secretly for immortality; to leave, I mean, a name behind him which will live forever in this world, whatever he may be doing, himself, in the next."

"I went to Rosemary Beach, Florida, for the first time in the spring of 2012."

"If one is to be called a liar, one may as well make an effort to deserve the name."

"If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough."

"India, Pakistan, China, Singapore and South Korea are heavily investing in nuclear arms. Since 21st century is the century of Asia, Asian countries should be the first ones to drop this arms race."

"Instead of eating, I do Botox. I have about 1,100 pounds of Botox all over my body. It's a body Botox and if it ever cracks, I'm in trouble."

"Is 'The Wind in the Willows' a children's book? Is 'Alice in Wonderland?' Is 'Treasure Island?' These are masterpieces which we read with pleasure as children, but with how much more pleasure when we are grown-up."

"It always tickles me to think of the meetings Super Dave has after every show."