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Demetri Martin

Demetri Martin

👨‍💼
Screenwriter
📖

American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist

📅

Born

May 25, 1973

🏙️

Birthplace

New York City

🏛️

Nationality

United States

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Other Occupations

Professional Background

screenwriterfilm actortelevision actorfilm score composervoice actor
8 quotes total
8 published
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"My favorite fruit is grapes. Because with grapes, you always get another chance. 'Cause, you know, if you have a crappy apple or a peach, you're stuck with that crappy piece of fruit. But if you have a crappy grape, no problem - just move on to the next. 'Grapes: The Fruit of Hope.'"

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Chance
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"People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which they're very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then they're kind of hard to tell apart - especially if the human is kind of hairy."

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Automotive and Cars
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"And my only rule being if when I wake in the morning I'm looking forward to the things that I have to do that day, then I'm on the right track."

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Morning and Dawn
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"But what I was going to say was, I just figured I'm going to go boldly in the direction of my dreams, say it as Thoreau would say, and just see where it takes me."

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Dreams and Aspirations
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"I like video games, but they are very violent. I want to create a video game in which you have to help all the characters who have died in the other games. 'Hey, man, what are you playing?' 'Super Busy Hospital. Could you leave me alone? I'm performing surgery! This guy got shot in the head, like, 27 times!'"

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Solitude
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"I think it's interesting that 'cologne' rhymes with 'alone.'"

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Solitude
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"Stand-up is like a row boat: it's fun and romantic when you're choosing to do it. But if you have no other choice than to be in a row boat it's not as enjoyable; that's survival."

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Romantic
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"The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly."

Demetri Martin

Screenwriter

Technology
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